Sunday, 18 January 2009

A neighbours point of view

As you all know, I have a dad crossed between victor Meldrew and the father from my family.

I know I have given you my view, as to what it is like to be a daughter to him, now I thought it a good idea to give a view from a neighbour!

Below is a email from my dad to his neighbour and a reply.

Good evening from neighbour of the year!!!

Having spoken briefly to your daughter this evening it pleases me to hear you are shacked up in some kind of concentration camp type halls of residence accommodation. It further pleases me to know you are NOT enjoying yourself and that you even have to HARDWIRE your laptop.....such a shame.

The purpose of this mail? No purpose whatsoever, other than to say how quiet and peaceful it's been these past days...that is aside from a bloody crowing cockerel who seems to think he needs to crow before sun up.....and a pair of hound which would put the Baskerville name to shame......

I trust your leave of absence will be extended and that indeed the village might yet see 2009 through without it's most annus horrendous resident.

PS.....If you are worried your absence will leave your garden looking a little unkempt, don' reached that stage about a year ago....

Best wishes for a continued camp like experience

The village's favourite neighbour

Neighbours reply

Dear Old Bastard Next Door

I am residing in student accommodation in salubrious Cirencester, mixing with the rich. As you will be aware, some of us are young enough to be students ~ whilst others have hung up their tool belt and gone into late retirement.

I did actually inform the poorly treated woman that tolerates you of this fact, but obviously your ears are so old, the words probably couldn't penetrate when she told you. In fact, your wife kindly offered your services to help with the animals should my dear daughters need assistance. With this in mind, would you take the dogs out for a 10 mile walk tomorrow please???

You do look like you need the exercise, so you wouldn't actually be doing me a favour, but, yet again, I would be doing a favour for you.

I also need to inform you that I have had many NICE cards and good wishes sent to me form the good people of our village, stating that the rest from my continually aggravating neighbour would do me a lot of good ~ despite all the law studying I have to undertake and exam next Tuesday ~ it's a holiday.

Well, I must go now, I need to get out of my single bed and lean out of the window and have a cigarette ~ oh student life is fun!!.

I'm back here next week as well, so I'll try to avoid you at the w/e

Best wishes

The Neighbour and student from heaven

I have more emails between then, but will post these at a later date. Hope this gives you some insight!

1 comment:

mjb said...

The woman is clearly unstable and almost certainly verging on the neurotic. My sympathies lie with your father